Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Lessons I Learned at Target Tonight

After dinner tonight, I kissed my husband and told him I was going out for a while. When I've been cooped up too long because of the cold or had an especially frustrating day with the kids, I escape to one of my favorite mini-vacation spots for a couple hours--the craft store, the library, or Target. Tonight, I headed straight to Target. 

Like the old lady I am, I got the only hot, caffeine-free, sweet treat I could think of at the in-house Starbucks--a vanilla steamed milk, and started wandering the aisles to warm my frozen body and soothe my frazzled nerves. I can wander Target for two hours or more, admiring the cute pillows, the newest kitchen towels, the perfectly co-ordinated seasonal offerings. And tonight I learned a few things too:

1. Target is just a teeny-tiny bit obnoxious. They have their swimwear out. Along with goggles, flippers, and floaties. Really? With the East buried in so much snow they couldn't get to their local Target with a sled and a half-dozen Huskies (do Husky dogs pull sleds? I dunno, but they look like they should), and us going on our third day of city-wide school cancellations due to snow and below zero temperatures, I just can't even. Really, Target? 

2. I cannot be held responsible for what I will do when presented with a whole display of discounted Post-it notes. There is no reasoning or resisting. They will come home with me. All the Post-its.

3. If I can tell, from two aisles away, in a matter of 15 seconds, that your child is sick, cranky, and up past his bedtime, you should be able to tell too. Go home. Nothing good comes from a toddler in Target past 9 PM. 

4. As addictions and coping mechanisms go, I don't think Target is such a bad deal. I mean, I walked out with a little linen envy--those pillows I always admire still on the shelf. But for $38.49--an hour and a half of quiet, calming decompression, plus a gallon of milk, paper clips, plastic wrap, and a lovely assortment of Post-it notes--not a bad deal at all. 

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